she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
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Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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