Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize
