Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize