Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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