Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
bring money and cleavage
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize