My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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