I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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