Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
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