Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(202): View more from Washington, DC

Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(202): Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask http://tfl.nu/68m0

Replies (8) Good night (1488) Bad night (373)
Favorite
(323): View more from California

You got in a fight last night?

(818): View more from California

Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.

(323): View more from California

Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(323): You got in a fight last night? (818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since. (323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you? http://tfl.nu/hf09

Replies (131) Good night (8268) Bad night (23695)
Favorite
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(724): This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text. http://tfl.nu/bfqf

Replies (15) Good night (2323) Bad night (1094) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(214): View more from Texas

apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......

(817): View more from Texas

told ya

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(214): apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back...... (817): told ya http://tfl.nu/csea

Replies (13) Good night (2530) Bad night (598)
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen http://tfl.nu/1apt

Replies (44) Good night (7896) Bad night (928) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(253): View more from Washington

i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(253): i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class? http://tfl.nu/um7r

Replies (46) Good night (2016) Bad night (4568) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(818): View more from California

First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(818): First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex. http://tfl.nu/u5cb

Replies (23) Good night (589) Bad night (6097) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(570): i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network. http://tfl.nu/mmjy

Replies (45) Good night (2617) Bad night (4553) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(910): View more from North Carolina

After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(910): After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could". http://tfl.nu/pxbj

Replies (22) Good night (7945) Bad night (1727) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(650): View more from California

at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(650): at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running http://tfl.nu/xnze

Replies (5) Good night (690) Bad night (2190) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(201): View more from New Jersey

just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(201): just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control http://tfl.nu/3b72

Replies (7) Good night (877) Bad night (1737) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(781): View more from Massachusetts

U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(781): U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life http://tfl.nu/mfnn

Replies (2) Good night (405) Bad night (670) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(914): View more from New York

Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(914): Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/r09f

Replies (8) Good night (347) Bad night (923) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness http://tfl.nu/k0cp

Replies (1) Good night (400) Bad night (140) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(817): View more from Texas

I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(817): I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita. http://tfl.nu/fdg7

Replies (3) Good night (502) Bad night (152) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: