Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
