First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Randomize
