Screwed.edu
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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