i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
