she smelled like a LAN party
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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