Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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