Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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