She said her name was "party"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize