she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
