how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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