So drunk its hurt
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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