so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
