Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
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I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
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You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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