She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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