I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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