the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
