Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
