Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.

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  (703): I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one. http://tfl.nu/4drw
  Replies (2) Good night (850) Bad night (889)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.

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  (262): Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other. http://tfl.nu/ky9n
  Replies (33) Good night (3883) Bad night (1273)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while

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  (817): well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while http://tfl.nu/ax7b
  Replies (33) Good night (1747) Bad night (5098)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.

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  (678): This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes. http://tfl.nu/jrvg
  Replies (63) Good night (7172) Bad night (1003)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?

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  (814): so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar? http://tfl.nu/t8an
  Replies (16) Good night (1582) Bad night (5381)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.

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  (201): Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait. http://tfl.nu/ab90
  Replies (10) Good night (3074) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.

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  (716): It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead. http://tfl.nu/ixsn
  Replies (3) Good night (2611) Bad night (973)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper

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  (720): me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling (303): Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper http://tfl.nu/d912
  Replies (3) Good night (2347) Bad night (1052)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice

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  (512): Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice http://tfl.nu/6dv2
  Replies (8) Good night (3186) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.

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  (914): We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar. http://tfl.nu/5gv0
  Replies (13) Good night (4096) Bad night (836)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.

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  (954): I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/1wnj
  Replies (5) Good night (887) Bad night (549)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.

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  (712): Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back. http://tfl.nu/llib
  Replies (11) Good night (580) Bad night (868)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!

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  (309): WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?! http://tfl.nu/237p
  Replies (5) Good night (912) Bad night (310)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives 

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  (614): His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives  http://tfl.nu/o3zv
  Replies (5) Good night (355) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Where did you go?

  (1-925): View more from California

  I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.

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  (925): Where did you go? (1-925): I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever. http://tfl.nu/3xtr
  Replies (0) Good night (755) Bad night (318)

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