Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way