but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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