I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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