i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
