u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
