After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
