um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Randomize
