I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
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Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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