I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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