is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ate ashes out of my bong
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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