Whod you bang
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I think people are normalizing furries
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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