I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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