Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
