marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
