I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you mean i was at the winter classic?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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