Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
