Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I am naked and annoyed.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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