she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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