what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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