I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Let's paint friendship bongs
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
