then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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