Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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