Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
