she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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